Thursday, October 7, 2010

No they will never understand...

In talking with all you twin mama friends, I hear and I say "nobody understands" but you all.  Why of course they don't how the hell could they, and why does it matter. Simple answer it doesn't matter, and it would not make us feel better if they did?  Only we can understand how hard it can be, how isolating it is, and also how wonderful it is!!!  Even our husbands don't get it, and we get irritated by that, like would it make a difference in how we feel or how our day goes if they knew exactly how we felt?  No it wouldn't, it may make us feel more validated in our stressed out meltdown moments to know they don't think we are crazy, and they know just why the littlest things bother us...or set us into meltdown crying over no vacuum bags in the house.  Yes, I did do that not so long ago, it was pure craziness, but a stressed mama wants to clean, well this one does anyways LOL.  I have really been thinking of this a lot lately because here I am a stay-at-home mom that wants to do so much with her life, but  (dare I say it) a bit held back but all the time and efforts that go into raising my children.  Now would I change that?  NO WAY, but that doesn't change the fact that it hurts to want to get up and go pursue a career, or a great love of a hobby.  I just can't, no time and NO ENERGY to do much other than cook three meals a day, clean up after those three meals, give at least two baths a day, scrub the floor a few times, pick up the toy bomb that goes off at least half a dozen time each day, and take a moment to breath after all the children are in bed.  And to all you working mamas that ask what do you stay-at-home moms do all day?  Grrrrrr watch soaps and do my nails duh what else, I don't think so, I can't even get up and take a pee when I want without a couple of shadows and a tantrum later.  Back to the point, there is no way anybody will ever understand what I do each day, or how I am feeling, so I guess now that I have finally excepted that, I can get over it and move on.  Not only do they not the frustrations of being a mother of twins, the do not understand just how wonderful it is raising two children that have an amazing bond, and get that opportunity to see them interact in such cute and precious ways.  So what is it that brought me here to blog about this?  Many of things, but one is today as I had to get out of this crazy zoo I call a home, so we went shopping.  Yes I took my 17-month-old rambunctious twin boys shopping at 2 different stores.  Oh and one of them was soooooooooo not twin friendly, barely fit through the front door with my double stroller (really come one I am not the only one in this town with two children in a stroller, accommodate PLEASE!!!), and the other had let the twinarazzi loose.  It was stressful, but fun as well.  My two little goofs cruising in the stroller just fascinated by everything from the sparkly jewelry to the clothes that would brush up against them and make them giggle, now something that little can make you smile and rethink how stressed and how you almost for a moment regretted even attempting to get out into the world past your gated off living room.  So after the giggles and eyes full of wonder, my mood had lightened, then on the way home I look in the rear view and see to blue-eye, blond cuties smiling at each other and talking to each other in a language only they can understand.  So who cares if we are all misunderstood, we are blessed beyond all belief with the two little miracles that have made us recreate ourselves and they way we live and think.

3 comments:

  1. I do NOT have twins but as a mother I DO understand and get frustrated daily but I've taken moments to say FAMILY first, Career second. I come from a huge family so when my sister, her four boys, my other sister, her four kids, my cousins (a million of them and their kids) get together...we're all running around with our heads off...it's insane! But at the very end of the day, we thank God for this crazy most beautiful life he gave us and embrace the moments that make this life worthy.

    xoxo

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  2. I needed this post today! I'm so glad I found this blog. Between this and the babycenter group, I feel like I actually DO have people who understand and that means the world to me!

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